i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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