you win again, gameday.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Randomize
