Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Randomize
