i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Lo siento on account of my penis...
Randomize
