Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
