Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
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