tell your sister to shave her snatch
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Randomize
