I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Randomize
