I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize
