So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Randomize
