did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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