The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
3 2 1 whiskey
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Randomize
