no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
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