I could have mohawked her pubes.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
Randomize
