I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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