You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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