We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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