you mean i was at the winter classic?
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
Randomize
