You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
i drank out of a bidet.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
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