I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
