i'm lost and i look like a hooker
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
It was a blind-side dick pic.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
