I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
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