Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
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