this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize
