smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
