the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
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