out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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