So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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