when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
Is it because I queefed?
We need to rekindle our bromance
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
Randomize
