I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
