Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
