I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
