I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Randomize
