oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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