just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
Randomize
