I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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