Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
