I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
