thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Randomize
