Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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