Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
im holly from the hills drunk
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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