there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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