Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
You can't just leave with hair like that
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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