He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
So here I am, sexting at work.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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