Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Randomize