I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
