He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
Randomize
