the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Drake has all the answers
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize
