I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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