She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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